The Crucial Importance of Compatibility
The Conventional Wisdom and Dr. Phil are Wrong Note: I wrote this essay in 2000 after my book, Will Our Love Last, was published. It is a summary of the book in 900 words. If you like the essay you’ll love the book. There is a conventional wisdom about marriage in this country. It […]
How to Emotionally Survive Donald Trump
I get it: Ever since November 6, 2024 you have felt increasing anxiety, depression, outrage, dread, and despair. Me too. And it’s not just us. The election of Donald Trump to the presidency of the United States for a second term has caused real and sometimes extreme psychological distress for many Americans. Psychotherapists all over […]
How to Overcome Public Speaking Anxiety
How to Overcome Public Speaking Anxiety – By Sam R. Hamburg | Copyright © 2025 Fear of public speaking is one of the most common phobias. Which is not surprising when you consider that you’re up there, everyone is looking at you, and they’re waiting for you to perform. Yikes! So, of course you’re […]
Is Love At First Sight Real?
Yes! Absolutely! Love at first sight happens…sometimes. Not as often as we wish it did. Not as often as we think it does. Let’s start with something that most of us have experienced now and then: like at first sight. You meet a new group of people—in a new job, new class, etc—and they […]
How to Get Over Public Speaking Anxiety–Instantly
Lots of people are afraid of public speaking—but you don’t have to be. There’s an easy way to get over it quickly, almost instantly. I didn’t just dream up what I am about to describe. It follows the logic of an approach to therapy invented by the Austrian psychiatrist, Victor Frankl more than 60 years […]
TOTALLY RELAXED DATING – An Article By Dr. Sam R Hamburg
Sounds like an oxymoron doesn’t it, like “dry rain” or “jumbo shrimp.” But you can totally relaxed when you’re out on a date. All it takes is that you understand this one simple truth: You can’t make anybody like you. We’ve all been taught since childhood that the task in social relations, whether romantic […]
YOU ARE NOT TO BLAME FOR YOUR MARRIAGE PROBLEMS— AND NEITHER IS YOUR PARTNER!
There is conventional wisdom about marriage in this country. It was formulated in part by marriage counselors and therapists, and it goes like this: “Marriage is good. So if your marriage is bad, that means that there is something wrong with you. You don’t handle conflict properly; you aren’t committed enough to your marriage; you […]
Transforming an Unhappy Marriage: Strategies for Managing Depression and Anxiety
Introduction Marriage is often portrayed as a source of joy and fulfillment, but the reality is that many couples face challenges that can lead to feelings of depression and anxiety. As a clinical psychologist specializing in anxiety disorders, including panic attack disorder, agoraphobia, social anxiety disorder, and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), I’ve worked with countless individuals […]
Coping with Frustration in Marriage: Strategies for Strengthening Your Relationship
Identify the Source of Frustration Marriage is a journey filled with love, joy, and companionship, but it’s also natural for couples to experience frustration and challenges along the way. As a clinical psychologist specializing in relationships, I’ve witnessed first hand how frustration can impact marriages and undermine the bond between partners. In this article, I’ll […]
Marriage Problems are NOT Communication Problems
Communication has become so identified with marriage and its problems that many couples come into my office and say, “We have a communication problem,” instead of just saying, “We have a marital problem.” They have learned this from marital therapists. It so happens that the pioneers of modern marital therapy were communication oriented. They thought […]